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How To Deal With Being In The Dreaded “Friend Zone”

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Getting in the Zone: Dealing with THAT Friend.

Time to get in the zone? 
The end zone. 
For that great view of the game of course… no wait, I definitely mean the FRIEND ZONE, where you have no game.

This is the mystical land that only seems to be for boys and men alike. If you were to scroll through your many social media feeds/platforms you would have see the endless number of relateable memes appearing in abundance these days. However this is not a one gender phenomenon but a two way street. DON’T get me wrong though, who wouldn’t want a lifetime membership and VIP seats in this zone, and for free? Consider yourself one lucky duck they don’t want to f… 

From experience here are 3 things you need to get movin’ on:

Man being rejected when is proposing marriage

1. Time

Probably the most obvious and painful element, definitely needed in the process of accepting and dealing with an end to your elaborate fantasies with your chosen person of interest … OR that one attractive stranger you see EVERYWHERE. Most of the time when you hear or see people say this it seems like a stupid idea. But honestly sometimes seven months is all you need to go from ‘OMG date me! PLZ HUMAN!’ to ‘What did I ever really see in you?’. Now during those months or weeks…or days…..or hours, how ever long it takes you, it feels like you will never truly move on, that this is it, the chosen human you refuse to give up. No matter how faulty or flawed, you will not be returning this mental purchase. Just remember, if it ever gets really bad, obsessive bad, it probably comes down to a combination of hormones, thirst and bad timing.

2. A Sense of Humour

If you can’t laugh at yourself and the awkward uncomfortable situation you are now in, then really who can? Not that this has to be awkward, but most of the time maintaining regular contact and a friendship is not an easy feet…without wanting to scream sexual desires at them… Or lunge, and lunge hard. Self-restraint equally comes in here, clearly. On a serious note taking something like this too seriously isn’t something you need in your life. Deep fried goods and funny animal memes are a much better choice. 

3. Goals

Your life has not stopped in this moment, so finishing this semester of school, or week of work, or even season of Scandal is something you should aim to do. Lets look at the bigger picture, really this is what helps you speed up the time when it feels like it could go no slower. Living beyond this one minute and thinking about exciting and new things to come will lead you to fresh opportunities. and maybe even unexpected potential interests… and by interests I mean humans. For me, I find taking in the view on the lawns of uni at lunch the best. There is an endless supply of perfect strangers to gaze at without any real consequences. Best part is you can do it again the day after with fresh meat hitting the grounds, and not just on all those BBQs that are a part of free uni club events. Where you can then meet more humans for future plans…

Lets be real though, the friend zone is really just this term that gets thrown around and made a bigger deal of that needs be. It’s not like we haven’t previously ‘cut’ guys or girls from our starting line up for the dating game, it’s just got a name now. Don’t even get me started on how much of a cop out it can be when reasoning why someone might not be interested in you. 

To finish, if you’re a dick, they don’t like you because you’re a dick. But of course we’re all lovely sound beings here with only optimism and no pessimism in our deep (dark) souls…

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Hey there! It's Monica, come join me for a conversation on the weird, the awkward and the shiny. From life observations to beauty product discoveries we will grow together and learn what it is to be adults. Or whatever it's called when you have all these responsibilities and instead have mastered the art of procrastination...